Fucking retarded computer.. God, I was typing in my journal and burning a CD for one of my friends and all th sudden my fucking computer freezes.. So I'm here thinking, "What.. The.. Fuck?!" and I totally blow up and start banging on the mouse.. Yeah.. Like that helped.. Anyways.. It fucked up my CD-R that I was burning (which F.Y.I. was the Deftones "White Pony" CD) so in my blind rage I took it out and broke it in half.. Only thing is, the fucker decided to split into millions of shardes and get imbedded in my fucking carpet! So at that point I was like, "GOD DAMNED MOTHER FUCKER!!" .. God.. I hate this god-damned computer.. *SMH* Anyways.. I'll try to recap what I had ALREADY typed but due to my fucking bitch-ass, shit-faced, piece of cunt computer, was deleted.. *SMH*...

OMG! Right now I just realized that I had already (or somehow it was saved) my other entree and the past entree I was begining to type was already posted as my last entree. GOD DAMN IT! Why the fuck do I find this out NOW when I just re-typed every fucking detail again.. OMG.. God, I'm going to KILL someone.. ARGGGG!!!! *SMH so violently that I crack a vertabra* AH! THAT FUCKING HURT! *SIGH* This is really pissing me off.. Ok, I just deleted the other entree - which had everything I was typing previously... *sigh* I'm so pissed.. Ok.. On with what I typed earlier..

Right now I'm thinking about my best friend (won't say her name cause I don't want to publicize it) who was recently dumped by her boyfriend. It really sucks cause I'm amazed that HE'D dump her.. I mean they looked like a perfect couple but I guess not. He used the 'sensitive' break up route by saying "I'm just doing this cause I don't want to end up changing you in the future," I mean, come on! I thought couples were supposed to be the opposite so they equal each other out.. But I guess it's not that way with him.. I remember when she first told me about it..

It was between 1st and 2nd period and she came up to me and asked "Hey, have you seen [His name]?" and I said "No." Then she kinda walked away like she was in search of him and I looked back at her and the way she walked away it looked like the kind of walk a person would do when their upset - ya know? So I immediately left the group and any conversation I was having to go see what was up and when I turned her around I saw that she was crying.. I asked her what happened and apparently he told her, "I think we should just be friends." So basically, he broke up with her.. I felt so sad, I must have given her 10 hugs today. And when I was talking to her during that passing time I looked back and saw my other friends just standing there wondering if they should come over.. They should've came with me over to see her.. I mean any close friend would do that - but I understand that they didn't know if they should've or not.. But then they did decided to come over and I thought it was kinda rude when one of them ASKED, "Do you want a hug? Cause I'm willing to give you one this time." And I was just appauled at that.. I mean, friends don't ask for hugs.. They just either give them or recieve them.. and thats that. But that just stuck out in my head. I don't blame her though - she's not the outwardly emotional person she could be. Anyways..

I really hope that my friend knows that I'm here for her - and I hope she knows that everyone else is too. We're all here to help each other out through these types of times. I'm here with an open ear, a shoulder to cry on and a heart that cares. I'll be here for each and every one of my friends till the very end.. I hope they all know that.. So if you're reading this now.. Now you know.. Heh.

Well.. Um.. Right now I feel kinda light-headed.. Damn love-spells.. Heehee.. Ya know, I was tempted SO much to take a few 'stealthy' pictures of JM today.. But then I realized I didn't have the time nor the courage to whip out my camera and set it on my desk directly in their direction and take a few pictures (without flash of course, so I don't instigate some suspicion).. But I will sometime.. Maybe during lunch time if I ever see them.. But blah.. They looked great today.. As usual. God.. I would absolutely love to go into detail about them - but due to the fact I don't know who reads my journals (except a few friends) I can't.. Don't want my little useless ramblings to get into the wrong hands..

Anyways.. I'll update later..

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