I'm updating for the second time today, so if you haven't read my other entree - read that one first then this one.

God damn it, Okay, I was talking to Jake and I was telling him how I have this friend of mine who's bisexual and I was asking Jake for some advice that I could give this friend (which is actually me) and when I was typing it he was begining to reply then guess what? MY FUCKING INTERNET FUCKING DECIEDES ITS TIME TO SHUT OFF! So yeah, it shut off, and it WOULD NOT reconnect... So I fucking got pissed off and called Angela who went online on my screen name and right as she was about to talk to him - he signed off.

Now I'm so fucking pissed.. cause first off - I FUCKING ENDED THE CONVERSATION ON A FUCKING BAD TOPIC! Secondly, my fucking interent blacked out when I needed it the most. THIS FUCKING BLOWS! Angela sent an email for me to him saying that I was sorry that I had signed off and that I was still looking for advice. Hopefully he'll understand and not be so confused. But that fucking little trick the net played on me just a few minutes ago WAS NOT fucking funny. I'm so incredably pissed off that I left at such a high point in the conversation. NOW I have to wait till he comes online tomorrow or even talk to him tomorrow at school. This blows. *sigh* I swear, One of these days I'm gonna take a hammer and fucking BUST this computer cause yeah sure it's been great most of the time but this little 'inncident' will linger for a while.. I wasn't even able to save the convo I was talking to Jake about! I wasn't even able to save an entree I was typing in here either! OMFG I'm so incredably pissed. Now Jake probably thinks of me as some fucking idiot.. I didn't mean to log off! I didn't mean to cut him off on what he was saying! Now I can only hope that tomorrow I can catch him online again and talk to him again. He's really difficult to find online and today was my day off from working out! So now I wont be able to be online till 4:00 and I'll probably end up not being online when he comes back online later.. *sigh* I'm so fucking aggitated now.. This isn't cool, I really NEED to see what his opinion is on the situation and for him to give me some advice. And also it'll leave an awkward moment if he remembers and asks me about it at school.. AH! And then I'm also gonna talk to Jeff tomorrow too! *sigh* Okay tomorrow I won't be taking any crap from anyone - I have some serious issues I have to sort out tomorrow so I need to get those out of the way and I won't feel better till they're cleared up and dealt with. So hopefully I'l lsee Jeff in the morning and I'll talk to him then, and then hopefully I'll talk to Jake in Spanish AND online. Cause it seems that we talk more online than in real-life.. Probably cause I'm the only one keeping the conversation going.. But OMG he could've been really open and talked to me about the whole issue TODAY! AH! I FUCKING HATE MY COMPUTER!

**sigh** I'm going to go on a long walk tonight and just get some thinking done. I don't know where I'll go or what I'll do.. but lemme tell you that I haven't felt this fucking pissed off since I found out I was moving this summer.

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