Well, I talked to Kensey last night. Things seem to be going great. I must be honest, the conversation I had with her was unlike any other. It was just so exciting to talk to her. Cause I'll admit -- we're both a bit wacky -- but I guess that's what makes me still want to hang out with her and stuff. She's really funny and she really seems to know how to enjoy life. I found out her last name [Kensey Kaminski] and how she was born with blue eyes but now she has brown eyes.. and how she used to have red hair but then it changed to blonde/brown. So it's cool. And she even asked me a few [RISQUE] questions like "when you like a girl, do you usually tell them upfront or do you shy away and try to hide it?" and I was like "usually the girl will know if I like them.. but I'll be honest.. I like you" and she was like "Hey, I like you too.. hehe" and so we talked about that for a bit and I was like "well, what about us?" and she responded with, "that maybe there is an us" and I said ":) maybe" and she was like "oooh, mysterious!" haha. It was great. So I'm thinking of asking her out on the following Monday [the 12th] and I really hope that things will last and stuff. It'll be exciting. But schools gonna end soon -- and it will be hard trying to hold onto a relationship through summer. But if I ask her out and she says yes -- I'm going to try my hardest not to let it go down the drain.

I just really don't want school to end. Cause school is the place where I can see all of my friends without having my dad drive me there.. Or anything tied to having my rents do anything ya know? It's like hanging out at someones house for the whole week. It's such a great time cause I get to see everyone and it just doesn't come with the obligations of doing it on the weekend. And I don't want to quit talking to all these new friends that I have now. I want to keep the friendship going and do things over the summer ya know? I also don't want to go out with Keney then have her not want to continue going out through the summer. Cause school is like the main reason for many things.. to hang out with your boyfriend/girlfriend and hang out. But over the summer it's hard to keep in touch sometimes. So I don't know about that. I'll discuss it with her sometime.

I feel kind of bad about the whole things too cause if I do end up going out with Kensey -- it'll distract more time away from Angela and more onto Kensey.. And I know that Angela already feels that way.. and it'll just get worse. I don't want Angela to be left out -- but yet I don't want to stop hanging out with my new friends at lunch either. I don't know what will happen. Cause we only got like one month left.. Thats just one month to hang out with these new friends and try to get their email or something so we can keep in touch over the summer ya know? I think that Angela will feel better in a while.. People go through funks and they just don't feel right. But I really don't want to quit hanging out with the new people. I'm enjoying lunch a lot right now and honestly -- it's like the only thing I look forward to at school now. And from that I might be having a girlfriend [which I'm really excited about] so.. I don't know what to say. But I do know that I'm gonna stick by Angela till she feels better.

I don't know if she knows this but when we were talking last night and she was bringing up counter points to try and keep me happy I was crying. But not cause of what you would think -- but cause she was right. She knows that I don't want to loose those friends and that in order for me to be happy is to not loose them along with her. But it was kind of the opposite a while ago when I was feeling down. I just don't know what to make of it all. I just want her to feel better. But I don't think that anything I can do will solve it. It will just have to take time for her to be on her own. But I'll be right by her side through everything if she needs someone there.

And as summer is coming closer and closer in view I'm begining to believe that we won't be moving this summer. Cause we still have so many things we have to do around the house and stuff [like painting the rooms, cutting some tree's, getting an appraisal for the house and etc...] and we haven't even done that yet. So I think that we'll end up staying for Sophomore year. I REALLY HOPE SO!! I'll be having such great classes next year and things would be so much more fun. But I'm not going to get into what would be fun cause I'll only set myself up for more issues if we do end up moving this summer.

And I guess I won't be going to Andy's birthday party thing. I feel terrible about the whole thing. My father won't let me go due to my grades and how he doesn't trust me.. and so I won't be going and Angela can't go. So it looks as if it's just Loretta and Andy. But then again -- it's always been that way.

I guess my rents just left to go to a flower show or something. They won't be back till 3 or 4. I kinda wish that Jake or Kensey or someone who would actually talk to me would be online. I guess today's going to be another day of doing nothing.

Today looks like its going to be a good day.. sucks that I have to be confined to solitude and wreckless abandoment.. But I'll try to make my best out of it.

I'm just kinda excited about the whole Kensey thing.. Okay yeah I talk about this alot in my diary now.. But she's just .. something else to me. When I talked to her I couldn't stop smiling and laughing and just .. I don't know! It was a great feeling though. I can't wait till Monday at lunch now. :)

I guess I'm going to go for now. I'll update later tonight around 8 or 9 -- depending on what happes ya know? So I'll talk to you all later and I don't have a song as of right now. Let alone -- no one reads them [I don't think] but I will offer a song for everyone to download: "Running Down" by Mandalay.

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