Well yes, I'm sweating like a pot-bellied pig cause of the heat. I have my fan on medium and I'm wearing my wife-beater and shorts.. Yes, and I'm still hot..

Well today is the starting day of the last 3 days of the school year. Mag isn't it? Well, for some this is a time of joy and happiness.. For others its a time of reflection and thought. I'm right smack dab in the middle of those two charactoristics.

I'm glad that its the end of the year.. School's over.. No more classes.. No more stress about grades.. No more obligations.. Sleeping in during the summer.. Having fun during the day instead of being at school..

But I'm sad cause I had such a great time this year.. Meeting new people.. Hanging out with friends everyday of the week.. And some of those friends I wont see over the summer and probably won't talk to again unless I have a class with them next year.. I'm also a bit sad cause there's a possibility that I wont have classes with the people I do now.. Like Jake for instance. But then there is also a chance that I will have a chance to have a class with them, and that fills me with hope.

But I'm also proud of the friendships I've made this year. It has been an amazing year and while I look back I think about everythings that happened and I'm very pleased with what has been done. Especially with me coming out with my sexuality and having so many people be accepting of it. I've also made friends with so many people in which I had NEVER thought I would. Like Jake, Emily, Kensey, Brittany, Julie, Lauren P and etc.. I'm glad that I did though, I now can say I have friends to rely on and to be there for me. Like Angela, Trevor, Roxy and so-forth.

I think what I'm gonna do for the summer, is call a lot of the people from my yearbook and set up some things to do. Like Emily and I have discussed, having a party with everyone coming and just hanging out and going swimming or something. That'd be tight. I also plan to work out this summer, I just haven't been able to get to it this week or lately for that matter cause of school work and time-constraints.. So I will start that up starting.. probably wensday after Trevor and I have our band practice.

I have the urge to listen to Korn's self-titled CD at the moment..

Today I don't have any homework.. and I ended up not presenting today in Spanish. Which figures.. But I guess I should start on reading the 11 books that I've bought, and started reading but never picked up again after like 2 days of reading it. I still have to read Stephen Kings, "Everything's Eventual" and the rest of, "Salems Lot" which I had started as a book report about 3 years ago but never finished.. I'm pretty far, just have about 100-190 pages left. Heh. So I'll be reading this summer.. working out.. and trying to spend every day doing something with my friends. This summer is going to be fucking awesome.

Haha, awesome! I checked on the top diary thingy and now I'm #197! Isn't that mag? And I have 2 votes from people who checked my website out through that website listing.. That's cool. Anyways, on with my entree..

Today was a bit boring.. But it seemed just like every other day.. But I do remember at lunch I got hecka pissed off.. I don't know why or how or who did what.. But I just got up and went to the other group. I seriously don't know why I was mad, but I felt the anger and I didn't want to be there anymore.

But while I was at the other group, Kensey and I were looking through the yearbook and pointing out 'ridiculously gorgeous guys' haha and I showed her Jason and she was like, "Wow, he's RIDicULOUSlee gorgeous!" haha, I'm glad that people agree with me on his hotness.. Cause he is, and it just so happened that he was standing like not more than 5 feet away from us talking to his friends or something. And he's such an intersting guy, he's like funny and sarcastic, and I love that! Haha, I only heard a few things he said but he seems cool. Maybe next year I'll have a class with him.. who knows?

Today I felt really good about myself though. Like my image and all. I felt a bit more attractive [and I'm not trying to be conceited or anything of the sort.. you should know better..] I know I'm not hot or even really cute, but I feel like I'm 'Okay' now. Which is good.. I don't even know why I feel that way, no one has even told me that they thought I was good looking, I just feel that way.. although I'm so pissed off at my gel cause whenever I spike my hair, it falls straight down which doens't spike up.. and I look so fucking awesome with spikes on my hair. I would like do my hair in the morning but when I'd leave the door, I'd check the mirror and the spikes wouldn't be there anymore and they'd be like flat.. It pisses me off.. I wish they would stay, so I think tomorrow I'm gonna try a new technique on doing my hair.. Less spikes and more thicker spikes.. Maybe they'd stay up better? I did it once with really long hair when I was going out with Christina and I went to a church thing with her.. and it was awesome.. I don't know how I did it, but it must have taken 15 minutes to do. Which for a guy -- that's a long time.

Wensday and Thursday are minimum days, and on Wensday I believe I'm having Angela, Trevor and Anthony come over to go swimming for a while, then have Trevor's dad take us to his house so we can jam. Angela will probably end up going home cause well.. there wouldn't be anything for her to do unless she brought her guitar. So I don't know. And then on Thursday I think that Angela and I should walk home. Like walk on over to McD's for lunch, then go to Sniffway [that's like a mandatory thing we do.. We check the magazines and stuff.. and usually get a candy] then walk home and stuff.. Depends on the weather.. Maybe we can go to her house and go swimming too? We could just get dropped off at her stop and walk to Taco Bell, talk there, and then go swimming at her house.. So I guess there's two ideas. I'll bring those up with her sometime.

Whoa!! The diary listing thingy just updated and now I'm at #188! And there's been now 3 people checkin my diary from the site.. haha thats cool. Yeah as you can tell I'm extremely bored.. O_o

Okay, you know what I'm gonna do.. I have nothing better to do so I'm gonna get really nasty. Now this wont be like the other "nasty" things I've said, cause this one will relate to sexual nature, gay sex, and well.. okay everything related to sex So I would highly recomend that you don't read the rest of this entree, just wait till you see the end of the "***"'s so you know I'm done. Yeah, I just need to get my mind cleared about my sexual fantasies.. So don't read this next section, alrighty? Unless you're a perverted pattie.. ;) But in all honesty, I would highly recomend that you do not read the following.

****************************************

Okay yeah, so you know I saw Jason today right? Well, he's always wearing those provocative shirts that show off your arm muscles.. Yeah, so those kinda shirts turn me on. And I'll be honest with ya diary, guys think about sex an awful lot.. and I believe I'm one of the expections that thinks about it maybe a bit too much. Haha, yeah so I was thinking about how Jason would be while giving anal sex and/or recieving [haha, that would be great if it was a threesome and he was giving anal while recieving..] anyways, and I thought about how long his penis would be. And in all seriousness.. Most really hot guys don't have the greatest penis'. Don't ask me how I know, I just sort of do. [And no, I'm not sexually active.. sadly] But I would bet that Jason is about a 6 or possibly 7 incher. And that's pretty big if you ask me. And another thing popped into my head -- I wonder if he shaves his pubic hair. Cause I know a lot of guys shave that stuff and shave their chest [which is good], their armpits [which is not good], their legs [which is not good either], and their pubic hairs and the hairs around their thighs.. And if you ask me.. I think I like it when they "trim" the pubic hairs, cause they can get like.. [hahaha] 'bushy' and thats not that appealing. But I hate it when guys shave their armpits and/or legs. That's not right! Cause those are the two places that are like.. well my fetishes if you may. So yeah, back to Jason's buisness [haha, I'm so naughty ;0] I believe he would probably shave it all off [the pubic hair that is] which I can see fit him well. Other than that he looks pretty naturally hairless.. ya know?

And now moving onto what I think of Jeff Loder. Hm.. I think Jeff would be more leaniant towards either leaving the pubic hair the way it is, or just 'trimming' it. Which that seemingly fits him well, but I can't see him being that hairy down there that much anyway, so I wouldn't be surprised if he wasn't that hairy down there either. And what I've observed [from numurous pornos I've viewed] that the guys that are really cute, but not extremely hot are the kind of guys who have the long penis'. I would suspect Jeff being about a 7 - 8 incher. Probably 7 and 1/2. But Jeff seems to be the kind of laid back guy and I would think [that if he was bi or gay] he'd be the kind of guy more prone to blowjobs rather than hard-on fucking. Jason on the other hand seems "frisky" and more "hardcore" in the sex scene, so I'd believe him to be more direct and action-based. Huh, they'd be a perfect couple.. Haha anyways moving onto Jake.

I would think Jake is more into the "trimming" ideas. I can't see him being hairless but yet I can't see him being really hairy either. And since he's really hot but yet extremely modest in all aspects.. I would suspect Jake is about a 7 incher. And he's what, only 15 so far? That's really big for a guy that age. I can imagine Jake being .. well he actually seems like he could be either way in the sexual front. Like, he could be fiesty and more into the fucking scenario, while he seems like he could be laid back and into blowjobs more. He's like the perfect mix of both..

I on the other hand will not disclose my "size" cause simply, there are probably friends that are reading this and them reading that.. would simply make me feel extremely uncomfortable. Since I know they totally ignored that warning and now bet they would've taken my word.. But I will say what I'm into more, I'm into the more action-scenarios.. so you should be able to figure that out with what I've said earlier about Jason..

So yes, that is all for today with my perverted sexual fantasies and thoughts..

****************************************

Okay, so if you just skipped over what I had just written, good for you. I'm glad you took my advice and now you probably don't feel like throwing up. ;)

Right at the moment, I'm listening to "Beauty Fiend" by My Ruin. They're such a tight British heavy metal band.

Well.. Nothing to do at the moment. The only thing I feel like doing is listening ot music, and watching the simpsons which should be on in 20 minutes. I'm hungry too.. like my dad has told me, I should be eating for two and working out on a daily basis. Which should be coming to a reality by the end of this week.

I can't wait till the last day of school. Sure, it will be sad saying bye to everyone.. but I'll be seeing them next year.. which next year will be my last year in this area.. Which really does suck but I think I can deal with it. Tomorrow will probably go by fast for me, but I'm going to try and make the best out of it. Yeah, this year has gone by really fast.. maybe a bit too fast for me to grasp everyting.. but I have next year, and next year will be perfect!

Well, I guess I typed a lot in here.. So I'll update it for the masses.. Haha, if you did read my little perverted sexual fantasies thing and you didn't want to read what I wrote -- it sucks for you, and maybe next time you'll believe what I say.. gesh. Okay anyways hehe, I'll update tomorrow as usual.. ;D

=->