[.:remember the future:.]
[hiv][older][about me][profile][d.land]
To Have & Not To Hold
August 28, 2003 //_ 7:10 PM

Well today was probably the best day I've had at the new high school. The highlights of my day were: Seeing Grant (hot guy in Music Lab class) change in PE; made 3 friends (and probably more tomorrow) in Music Lab (their names are Racheme [??spelling??], Jessie and Carly); failed my Spanish quiz and my new ear piercing kinda hurts.

I'm just kinda glad that I made some friends. Racheme has 4th lunch with me so tomorrow I'll probably stop by and see what's going on. I owe her 2 pink bracelets.. hehe. I think she's really cool, she went to Ozzfest and saw Korn and Marilyn Manson. *thumbs up*

Oh yeah, as for Spanish.. I failed it.. horribly.. since I studied the FORMS and not the translations.. how fuckin sad huh? It sucks. Now I bet I have a D in that class. And if I fail any classes or get a D in any class my dad is taking away my computer AND tv. Yup, he added that tv thingies in cause "the bigger picture isn't getting to me clear enough" .. so I guess that means threatening me more will do the trick huh? What about stating some rewards? Don't you think I'd be more willing to get good grades with REWARDS?! .. I'm gonna state that to him.. maybe he'll crack and get me a drum set if I get good grades. :D

Yay. Liberty just said she'd talk to Danny about me when she sees him tomorrow. For all you who don't know, Danny is a gay guy at our school and I've been TRYING to meet him recently cause I really feel like I need to talk to a gay guy in person instead of my straight friends cause sometimes.. they just don't know how I'm feeling or what I should do. So I've been trying to meet him but Katie is unreliable and Nate says Danny hates him (same for Josh) so .. I hope that Liberty will follow through and introduce me to him. ..damn it, I need to look kinda gay tomorrow if I meet him. I don't wanna scare him off with my image.. since Danny is a prep and if he's a gay stereotype he probably only likes pretty boys. *sigh* *has an anxiety attack*

You know, I don't think I'll ever be a "pretty boy" .. that is if I'm not one now. But I'm not really preppy. I may have a FEW preppy shirts but not entirely. I always back myself up with something "punk" or "goth" .. I don't think I'll ever be really appealing to gay guys. And that sucks. Cause if I was some other gay guy and I saw me walking by, I wouldn't find myself attractive.. and I mean that from THEIR point of view. I'm dead serious too. I need to have like.. some gay guys re-do me into the gay fashion and make me over. ..er maybe not..

I think sooner or later I'm gonna try talking to Grant (from Music Lab) or Glenn (from PE) .. Obviously, sooner or later I'm gonna talk to Glenn since he's on my baseball team and he's the leader of the team.. I'll have to kinda work my way for Grant. But if there isn't an opportunity to talk to them.. I don't care. It's still all good.

Holy crap, TLC is playing on my playlist and I haven't listened to TLC in forever. I'm still supporting "mah girls" .. hehe. I'm still gonna be buying their greatest hits which should be coming out in September or December. I'm looking forward to that. Oh yeah, and the VMA's are on at 8:00.. which is in about 7 minutes for me. I'm only watching it to see if any GOOD bands are playing. I saw Avril Lavigne on there.. UGH I want to kill that bitch for making all these preppy girls turn "angst/punk" .. she's such a poseur and it enrages me. *will take a shotgun to her head any day of the week*

So hopefully I'll meet Danny and he'll like me, or at least like me enough to talk to me so we can become good friends. That's all I want. I don't care if he thinks I'm ugly, but as long as I can be his friends and talk to him about a few issues.. that's all I ask for. And by what I hear -- he's a cutie. Heh.

Hmm.. things with Joshie are going good. He's busy with school work as usual. But I don't blame him. Joshies the kinda guy who has his future planned out (or most of it) and I wouldn't be the one to stand in his way. I love him too much to disrupt his studies. I should be studying myself but .. I'm lazy and a whore so that won't ever happen. *puts pleasure before work all the time* I still love Joshie.. just wish things could be like it was in the summer.. more flirty. I liked it so much then. :D

Well.. I should be going now. I think the VMA's are staring. I pray to ALLAH that there won't be any stupid, retarded stunts to try and act like they're all angst driven and "hardcore" .. it's so annoying now.

=->

« before ⎨&⎬ after »



xxx