now, its been a week.
thoughts have passed
(millions of him in my periphery)
and 5 phone calls later i've realzed that through my accusation that maybe he hates me, he just didn't know it was me.

she told me he knows now
that he'd call me sometime
there's still a week till i see him
and i'm not sure how i should act
(who should i be today?)
and there's a 75% chance that the me i pick to be, won't be what he likes.

i'm just so nervous.
never knowing what to say.
planning my speech to not studder my phrase.
(make it clear to him what i feel)
after all this thinking you'd think i was strong enough to speak.

just not when he's on the other line.

xxxx