and as if we had been talking all along, we would sit not more than 5 feet away from each other, and send text message after text message when we could've just used our voices. but we never really talked with our voices much anyway.

things started easy and light. nothing more than regarding pants and smiles. but somehow texts started becoming emotions and it was draining me dry. it felt like we had created something, and destroyed it before we even had a chance to grasp it. if everything were meant to be light, i'm still the one sinking to the bottom : full of thoughts and hurt. somehow i knew i'd end up like this.

and you have another half of you waiting for you at home. i know your intentions were nothing more than glitter-sweet but i'm feeling so .. empty now. i miss you when i have no meaning. we'll be just as friends : maybe things will begin to change. i have to change my thought process and meet you on the other side. why am i always the one sinking to the bottom? i'm always let down.

i'm still just 17. no need to think i'll never find someone. that's immature. i'm just a sweet guy : i'll definitely meet someone that will love me for that.

why does everyone seem to tell me the same thing? i'm tired of my age being an excuse. if i'm a sweet guy, why don't you care? why aren't you the one that will love me for that?

then you text me 'Goodnight' .. and i'm hoping this morning will turn into something positive. may sleep burn away my thoughts. i'm tired of thinking.

xxxx