[.:remember the future:.]
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With These Standards I'm Forced To Love ... Make Me Disappear.
August 16, 2005 //_ 10:21 PM

rearranging these mixed puzzle pieces are beginning to loose their form. maybe if i'd've left them where they were i wouldn't have this beautiful mess lying all around me.. falling where they're not supposed to conform.. detailing every mis-matched line and dots with the wrong eyes. and now he suspects. and i'm not getting involved. the silences of thought are now transending to awkward and i know what to say .. but my lips are sewn shut. i won't say a pretty little word until i wake up.

[i should've never thought you could love me in the first place.]

my [void] emotions are weighing back on my shoulders. i'm hesitent as to what i'm thinking but i'm not getting where i wanted. and [it feels like] i'm loosing both of what i held granted. never knowing is the key i hate.

tonight i'm leaving, although i have school tomorrow - i have to get out .. it'll be hard to adjust sleep earlier than 4AM. maybe time apart will repair.

xxxx

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xxx