it feels like I've just been waiting for something big to happen. and I don't mean like, a promotion or a new hair cut or a new album coming out.. I mean like big. DEVASTATINGLY HUGE thing to happen, come into my life and make me rearrange everything in a new way. feels like I've been stuck in this pattern for too long. work, drink, dance, sleep. then somewhere fit in eat, shit and work out. repeat.

one thing for sure: I quit smoking as of yesterday. time to start making my own life live for me rather than just waiting around for something to come around I guess.

maybe thats what I've been doing wrong. maybe I just need to think of it more along the lines of doing better for myself then eventually something equally (if not even better) will come and bash me in the head.

I just feel so restless. and bored.