Okay.. So last night I went to Sadies.. Everything was great. My friends and I danced a bit [even though two of them were complete drags most of the time] but I don't care.. I wasn't about to let them ruin me from having fun. So anyways, I went with Angela and we slow danced to every slow dance song [which was only 3] and at the begining of the dance it was a bit boring - no one was doing anything but finally after about 15 minutes we all loosened up [well at least Angela and I did] and we just danced.

The only thing that offset the night for me was towards the end of the dance when I saw Jake sitting on the bleachers. At first he was just sitting there and I had seen him earlier in the dance but he was never really with his girlfriend Ashley. I mean, I saw them there but he wasn't dancing or doing anything. So when I saw him on the bleachers I thought that maybe something was wrong - maybing she dumped him - maybe he was having personal issues.. Whatever it was it made him cry and I saw this. It made me feel so sad - I don't like seeing him unhappy and I could tell he wasn't happy. I mean, when you look at someone who's been crying - you can tell by that little glisten in their eye, ya know? And I saw that in him. I was planning to walk over and talk to him but he was with some other friends... and none of them were talking to him! No one seemed to really care. But then after a bit, his girlfriend came over and I guess they talked or something. And towards the end of the dance, my friends and I walked outside to get a drink of water and who do I see talking to another girl outside? Jake. And I saw that but I wasn't going to say anything but when we were going back into the dance I saw Ashley and I asked her "what's up with Jake?" and she replied with, "I don't know.. Where is he?" and I pointed her in his direction and I guess that she went out there and grabbed him to come back inside for the last slow dance. And oddly enough, they came back inside and started to slow dance right next to Angela and I. I could easily tell that something was wrong. And at the end of the song I looked over at Jake and Ashley and I saw that he was about to kiss her when she turned her head. I was like so torn about that! It was sad! But when I saw him crying I like froze.. And I believe that Angela noticed that and she gave me a big hug. It was really sweet of her.

So when the dance ended, Angela and I went outside to wait for her mother and I was looking for Jake and Ashley but I guess they stayed inside and talked or something. Maybe they went out another way.. I dont know. But I didn't see either of them after that dance. So I've been waiting for them online today so I can try to talk to them. But they haven't been online thus far.

So I've been thinking about that and on top of that I was planning to do something today with Loretta and Angela.. Loretta had called me and asked if I wanted to go to the Sunrise mall with her to get clothes and I was like "Sure! Maybe Angela could come too!" but Angela went to Church [her mom is forcing her to go now..] So we were gonna wait for her.. But after I got off the phone with Loretta, my dad came up to me and was like "Holy shit! What's up with your eye?!" and so out of default I grabbed my eye and ran to the nearest mirror and guess what I saw?! FUCKING REDNESS!! I HAVE PINK EYE!! no FUCKING wonder it's been itching for 4 days... This blows! It's not itching right now but I don't want my friends to suffer... So I think I'm not gonna do anything with them.. Also cause it looks really frightening.. I was scared when I saw it.. So I might be able to do something with Angela but if we do - I'm not gonna try and touch her and I'll have to like.. wash my hands a lot.. Cause she lives in a house full of kids and just IMAGINE how it would be if ONE of them got infected??!! CHAOS!! So, maybe if I go with Angela to do something - we can just skateboard around and go to Jack N The Crack to eat lunch maybe. But that might not even happen cause I'm probably gonna have to go to a prompt care place to get my eye looked at.

I just looked at it and it's getting less red and it's not itching anymore.. So hopefully it'll be gone by tomorrow cause it's pissing me off so fucking much..

Anyways..

Last night, Angela and I stayed up late and we found tons of new bands.. Well, if not her - I have! Bands like: Audiovent, Bright Eyes, Dashboard Confessional, Finch, Idlewild, Less Than Jake [tee hee... Jake...], New Found Glory, Riddlin Kids, Something Corperate, The D4 and Zwan. I may have heard of them before but I never really started listening to them until now.. Hehe, so it's all good. They're all really great bands.

Yay! I just got my eye checked by my step-mom's mother and she said that it doesn't look like pink eye at this moment - but if it gets worse it may be. She said that it's probably just irritated and I DID just mow the lawn.. And I am allergic to dead grass.. So I guess we're just gonna go get some Visine or something.. haha. Yay! Now I can probably go to JNTC with Angela later. And I guess Kami is going to be going to some Persian thing. I wish I could go.. But nooo.. No one invites me [haha.. just playin] But I bet it would've been really fun. I hope she has a great time.

Eh, I have so much shit to do. I gotta do a project for Spanish and Health. I also have homework in Spanish and I have to clean my room [and THAT will take a while..] And I'm waiting for Angela to get home so I can do something with her now then come back home at like 4:30-5:00 then clean up my room then do all my homework. It would work out great.

Man.. Bright Eyes is great.. I love the song "Lover I Don't Have To Love" .. That song is sooo fucking great. Masterful.. Anyways..

I guess I'll go now.. The monsters are calling me.. I'll leave with the lyrics to the song "Lover I Don't Have To Love" by Bright Eyes so you can all see what I'm talking about. Heh, so yeah - enjoy.

"I picked you out Of a crowd to talk to you Said I liked your shoes

You said thanks can I follow you? So it's up the stairs And out of view

No prying eyes I poured some wine I asked your name you asked the time

Well it's two o'clock Yeah the club is closed we're up the block

Your hands on me Pressing hard against your jeans

Your tongue in my mouth Trying to keep the words from coming out

You didn't care to know Who else may have been here before

I want a lover I don't have to love I want a girl who's to sad to give a fuck

Where's the kid with the chemicals? I thought he said he'd meet us here but I'm not sure

I got the money if you got the time He said it feels good I said I'll give it a try

Then my mind went dark We both forgot where your car was parked Let's just take the train

I'll meet up with the band in the morning

Bad actors with bad habits Some sad singers They just play tragic

Now the phone's ringing And the band's leaving Let's just keep touching

Let's just keep keep singing

I want a lover I don't have to love

I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk

Where's the kid with the chemicals

I got a hunger and I can't seem to get full

I need some meaning I can memorize

The kind I have always seems to slip my mind

But you but you You write such pretty words

But life's no story book Love is an excuse to get hurt

And to hurt Do you like to hurt? 'Cause I do I do I do This didn't hurt me

Didn't hurt me Oh this hurt me..."

Love for the masses always,

=->